What is “weird” anyway? “Strange” and “bizarre” one might suggest; “unusual or surprising in a way that is unsettling or hard to understand.”
Sometimes we’re afraid of the unknown, and instead of feeding into our curiosities and filling ourselves with the knowledge of experience, we quickly dismiss things we don’t understand. Well guess what — ignorance ain’t bliss… especially in your pants! Just ’cause you popped your cherry already doesn’t mean there aren’t more sensations to explore. Broaden the horizons of your ecstasy, and experiment with a new shape, a new texture, or even a new fetish!
Santa dropped a load of XXX gifts under my bearded pink tree (no, this is not a vagina metaphor, my Christmas tree is pretty and hairy…), including the Icicles No. 24. I had my eye on this sucker from the moment I first saw it in our showroom. It’s made of clear, pink glass with sucker-like bumps along the top of its curves, and a subtle veiny texture on its underside.
Glass and odd textures were totally new to me, so I was super psyched to get this Icicle, and after popping my glass toy cherry I couldn’t stop! I’m usually always down for a hard ramming, but I found myself being really gentle with this item, using lots of Moist lube to slowly slide it in and out, feeling every. single. bump. I was surprised at how good it feels to use as a clit massager too — gonna hump these bumps for life! I think I used this Icicle at least twice a day the entire first week I had it. Yes, it’s that good. I mean, the thing looks like a fucking tentacle! Who doesn’t wanna fuck a tentacle?
The Icicles No. 38 is next on my list of “Weird Textured Glass Things That Belong In My Vagina”. No, it’s not an internal meat grinder. From what I’ve heard, first you just twist it into your hole (with the help of a fuck ton of Moist lube, duh). Once it’s in, you can either just twist it back and forth, or simply leave it inside of you while you play with your clit and feel your pussy clench against the twists and crevices of the Icicle. The ring at the bottom makes it easy to handle, but can also fit a bullet! I found that our Deluxe Multi Speed Bullet fits perfectly into the hole, so I’m really intrigued to see how some internal vibrations will enhance this experience. Bullet in a screw, Wanachi on your clit – holy hell, I think I already came.
So now that I’ve fucked a tentacle, it’s on to extraterrestrial cock! Or at least that’s how I like to think of my Fetish Fantasy Elite 8” Dildo. I’ve never been a fan of “natural” looking dicks, and only own purple or glittery ones, so I was pumped when I saw we not only had a line of Elite Silicone products, but ones that look like torpedoes and alien dicks!
The 8” Dildo has been totally relevant to my interests, satisfying both the weirdo and sex toy connoisseur in me. I think we’ve established how wonderfully weird this thing looks, but the texture is amazing too! The ripples are defined enough to feel every detail, yet subtle enough to be used for a good pounding. The curved G-spot stimulating tip hits all the right spots, and the silicone material? Fucking exquisite! It works great as a strap-on, but I’m a huge advocate of wall banging, so this suction-cupped cock is perfect for solo playtime too.
I might actually die if I have to wait any longer for the release of our Fetish Fantasy Extreme Black Baron Hood. What turns me on so much about this hood is its versatility. Enhance the suspense of restraint and the titillating twinges of a sadistic spanking with complete sensory deprivation. If that doesn’t totally get you off, then tear off the blinder and gag and any sub will be starving for a face fucking, happy to devour whatever Master is willing to serve. Shit, now my mouth (and pants) are watering!